I’ve heard Anthony speak a couple of times now, and the poem that stands out to me talks of his upbringing in East London and how he had to build a tough exterior and swallow some of his softer, creative traits. He is open and honest about his struggles and how, finally, he is finding his voice as an artist. Now, Anthony is giving back by building platforms to lift up other creative people. Going by his poetry moniker "Lewistry", he weaves his history into his poetry as a focal point for his work and recovery. His poem is a tough read, especially if you have found yourself in a similar situation. Ask Anthony though, and he’ll tell you it’s a reflection on where he’s coming from, where he can’t return to, and how by reliving it he can move forward. Over to you Lewistry.
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I first started writing during Lockdown 2020 as I was struggling with the mental side of my addiction, trying to stay clean. I was living on my own at the time. I began to write down my feelings. With no N.A. meetings to attend and no one to relate with, I found that when I wrote down my thoughts, I was capable of solving my problems. The solutions looked so simple on paper. It was funny to see what I was worrying about, being that I am still alive after all the trauma I have been through since my childhood.
I started to turn my feelings into poetry and then shared them with people to see what they thought about it. The response was overwhelming. The next thing I knew, I had made a collection called the ‘Pandemic Angelics’ and did a Zoom event performing it with other creatives and earned money doing so. This was the birth of Lewistry the poet.
I Need A Bit Of Gear
How long have I been addicted to her now? 20/25 years and some change?
You would have thought that in all that time, I would have figured out a way to have her
lying next to me each morning,
instead of mourning the fact that I'm yawning with tears streaming down my face, snot out
of my nostrils that tastes like sea salt every time it touches my lips.
It's snug and warm in this bed. If it were up to me, I would stay in it instead.
But this cold chill that violates my body and sends icy shivers down my Jacob ladder
will make me regret not getting up before feeling too rough.
I NEED A BIT OF HER
I need her soothing touch to cool my fever
her warm caress to rid me of this glacial iceberg attached to my spine.
I need her edict to bring order to my chaos, which is causing the upheaval within my
stomach.
If I can just earn a score, it will buy me enough time for her
to stop the pain I get when she isn't here.
I love her so much, she cancels out my bane and replaces energy when I'm drained, she
never belittles me, moans, or complains, instead, she sets me free like Mandela by breaking
my moral chains.
Then I go to sleep, and she fades away.
Wasn't last night perfect, just you and me? You justifying my wrongdoings without
questioning or reasoning.
Because you understand that I do this so we can be together, then I open my eyes and you
are gone, what did I do wrong?
You've left me cold & sick, sick & tired, and it's becoming tiresome for me, but you tirelessly
inspire me to chase you like a dragon, and like a vehicle ready for the scrapheap, my tires
are wearing thin.
But I guess none of that will matter once you are in my arms because you will straighten out
my mind, make my reality feel fine, and in that very small moment, you are all mine, but till
then.
I Need A Bit Of Gear
On the writing process
I use a trauma, a memory, an incident in current affairs, and add my take to it using a metaphor, for example - I call this a ‘car scheme’.
I started to unlock the door to my mind to map out a way to motor through my life, but I needed the key to start the engine to my heart, but it was driving me mad that I was stuck in the traffic of my mental madness, so I had to park myself in a park to refuel as life's booth was starting to take its toll.
The buzz I get when I write poetry in this way gives me a bigger high than any drug has ever done. And the more intricate it is, the bigger the buzz.
It also puts the issue I am going through at the time into written form and that helps me find a solution. Not just to improve my life, but so I can finish the poem on a positive note. I want to be a poet that doesn't just entertain with clever wordplay and insight, I want to help the audience who are going through a similar issue and might not be able to find the solution. Writing and performing poetry has become central in my recovery and I am pleased to say I am two years clean. Although I may need to address my coffee intake soon! I am hoping by reading my poem and story that others might see a pathway out of a difficult space.
Beyond the writing itself
I started a podcast called LewistryisPoetry on Spotify using a phone and laptop. I had by now written a library of poems, which I was ready to showcase to the world. It grinds on me that people have been made to believe that they are too old to become what they want to become, too far damaged to make an in impact in society, that their criminal record stops them from achieving their dreams, that there is no funding for anyone over the age of 25, that life has passed you by –
“Settle for what you are given, you are lucky to be alive”. NO, I SAY.
Wealth isn't about how much money you make or what assets you have; that's riches. Wealth is your health, not just physically, but mentally and spiritually, wealth is not a job or a career of your choosing, it isn't how quick you achieve success it's the enjoyment in how you got to it. I could go on and on but the point I am making is that I want to create a pathway for people who may only have lived experience but are ready to thrive in their most creative form.
Right now, I am forming a Co-Op of poets. Creatives that will change the poetry scene for decades to come. Through podcasts, events, shows, newsletters, and magazines, we will change the world and we will have a healthy, enjoyable time while doing so.
Favourite poets, poetry nights, books, or other resources
I am and have been influenced by Eminem, Plato, Homer, and Akala. My favourite book is Pantographia by Edmund Fry.
Email Anthony to talk more about his work, his Co-Op available for events, or to be featured on his Spotify podcast at - Lewistry25@Yahoo.com
Write Speak Recover, in collaboration with TheNeverPress is an open, free collection of original portraits of poets using their art to find strength in their recovery journey from any form of dis-ease.
We invite you to follow Write Speak Recover on Instagram and to reach out to Tim Foley at WSR or us directly at the zine to learn more, or put yourself forward to be featured in this initiative.
Be kind. Stay present. One moment after the next.
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