I’ve been watching Alan’s @im.not.leaving.yet series for a while and was pleased to finally meet the real man behind the reels. Alan is all about collaboration, we met in his kitchen in Walthamstow and it was a perfect place to chat and create, over a cuppa. I shot my portraits and he shot me for his page which made for a lovely circuital experience. Alan told me he carries his story on his body, and we shared our tattoos with each other like Quint and Hooper sharing scars in Jaws! Two poets with painted pasts and the ink stains to prove it. It seemed right to share them with you too, along with Alan’s poetry.
Please be mindful that WSR content can be thematically sensitive.
Alan
I go by pulling teeth. I like having a stage name because I can hide behind it and say and share things about my life that I normally would not do. I am getting involved in this project to share some of my work in the hope it will help anyone struggling or, who has been through what I have been through. For me poetry is a way of healing, whenever I read my poems live, the world stops and it's just me and my words.
Baby shoes
What have I done with the other pair of baby shoes
Once 4 now only 2
They were never worn, forever brand new
Thinking of my favourite colour
pink fades to baby blues
What have I done with
the other pair of baby shoes
Once 4 now only 2
2 years of grief is too much for me to bear
I carry her everywhere small blond curls of her baby hair
I hid the shoes next to the baby scans on your mother's night stand
I have found your baby shoes
Once 4 now only 2
I have found your baby shoes
Pink fades to baby blues
On the writing process
I normally write the bones of my poem on the SL1 bus, which is the best bus because it takes an hour. Then I refine or add new bits while I'm on the tube, currently I have writer's block but I have had some ideas so fingers crossed there will be new poems in the future. I feel that I will never be in true recovery (whatever that means) as I don’t think I can ever truly move forward but I take it step by step, day by day, and for now, that is enough.
Favourite poets, poetry nights, books or other resources:
Kae Tempest
John Cooper Clarke
T.m/o
Amy Williams
Write Speak Recover, in collaboration with TheNeverPress is an open, free collection of original portraits of poets using their art to find strength in their recovery journey from any form of dis-ease.
We invite you to follow Write Speak Recover on Instagram and to reach out to Tim Foley at WSR or us directly at the zine to learn more, or put yourself forward to be featured in this initiative.
Hit the logo for more Write Speak Recover content 👇
If you need support, here are some resources: